


Seeing His Smile

by flightinflame



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Ficlet, Fix-It, Getting Together, Injury, M/M, eye damage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-11
Updated: 2013-10-11
Packaged: 2017-12-29 03:02:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1000082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flightinflame/pseuds/flightinflame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint knows he deserves to suffer for what he did under Loki's control.  The universe seems to agree - he's lost Coulson, and his eyes are damaged.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seeing His Smile

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Ralkana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ralkana/gifts).



> For the prompt: Imagine your OTP finally came together, but it happens that person A has some issues with seeing and needs to have an eye surgery. Before the operation begins A says to B trying to encourage B: “Don’t cry, everything is gonna be okay. And if this is the last thing I’m going to see… I want it to be your smile.” and B smiles, while A slowly falls asleep. 
> 
> Warnings: Very mild mentions of eye injuries, discussion of brainwashing.

After the battle, things were different.   
Clint had to live with what he had done. It was hard, to reconstruct his life, to try and rebuild all the bridges that Loki had made him burn. He had no chance of forgiveness, and he knew that. He'd messed up, he'd fallen under the thrall of a monster...and the more he thought about it, the more he blamed himself. 

Natasha's hand on his shoulder did nothing to soothe him, it didn't take away his guilt or responsibility. He deserved to suffer, deserved to be punished for what he had done. But lucky or not, he had been. The three worst punishments he could ever imagine, and he was getting them all simultaneously. It wasn't enough to make up for what had happened, but it still hurt.

Worst, undeniably worst, was the fact that Coulson was gone. The first good man he had met, the voice in his ear that he trusted with his life again and again, was dead. And it was as much Clint's fault as if he had been the one to shoot him.

Then came the fact he was off of active SHIELD duty, seen as a possible traitor and suspended while they investigated the situation. Then finally, last, a final punishment for all that he had done for Loki, was the fact that his eyes were damaged. Glass apparently - it was no surprise. There had been a lot of explosions in the battle, and he'd fallen back through a window pane, and he'd been hurt. There were cuts all over his body, including his eyes.

He wasn't first in the cue for a medical exam - it wasn't like the staff wanted to treat him. Instead, he went for dinner with the rest, his fingers lifting to rub at his eyes which were beginning to get sore. Every touch made it worse. Eventually, Stark led them all back to his place, and he lay down on one of the huge spare beds and closed his eyes to sleep.

He woke in agony, unable to supress a scream of pain that brought Natasha running to his side. She gripped his hands.  
"Clint..."   
"What is it?"  
"Your eyes... they're bloody, they need treatment, I'm getting you to medical..." Her hand wrapped around his arm, and she was calling for help, and all Clint could do was try his best not to cry.

He was shown through to a medical room where Fury was waiting. Clint couldn't bring himself to look at him.  
"You shouldn't be treating me. There are other people that need help. And that's my fault... I don't..."  
"There's someone that wants to see you Agent. I suggest you make decisions affecting your future after you hear what they have to say."  
"Fine." Clint muttered, spitting out the word in disgust. Nothing that was said would be enough. He stared blankly at the wall.

"Clint?" The voice behind him was soft, cautious, but unmistakable. He'd heard it hundreds of times before, but never sounding so cautious. He twisted around to see Phil sat in a wheelchair in the doorway.

Phil wheeled closer to him, resting his hand against Clint's.   
"I thought I'd lost you..."  
"Yeh..." Clint swallowed. "I thought that I'd lost you as well, but you're here... They said you died."  
"I did... but it was only temporary... now, what's this about my best sniper damaging his sight?"  
"It was worth it. We won."  
"Never doubted it Clint. But I wish you'd stop getting injured...You're worth more than that."  
"A sniper with no sight is worth nothing."  
"You're worth so much to me. More than just your ability to do your job. You always have been." Phil's thumb stroked the back of Clint's hand, and the action was amazingly gentle and soft. Clint felt himself relaxing, glancing up at Phil in confusion.  
"You... you like me?" Clint murmured, his voice shaking as the anaesthetist came in to prep him for the operation.  
"Much more than like..." Coulson answered as the mask was fitted. He sounded choked up, and when Clint looked at him he saw that there were tears making their way down Coulson's face.

"Don't cry. Everything is gonna be okay. And if this is the last thing I’m going to see… I want it to be your smile.”  
Coulson squeezed his hand, smiling down at him through the tears, and Clint felt himself smiling back. He took another couple of breaths through his mask, and felt the world fading away, his hand loosening its grip on Phil's.


End file.
